This part was interesting to me for many reasons: Bill took care of his infant son during the day while combing the internet and making calls. He was noticeably deterred and unhappy about the course his life had suddenly taken in terms of his job loss, and he was receiving assistance from a Positive Psychology Coach who had graduated from The University of Pennsylvania's Positive Psychology Program http://www.sas.upenn.edu/lps/graduate/mapp.
While he clearly enjoyed being with his son, Bill spoke negatively about his situation, and seemed stressed and stuck much of the time they captured him on film. The coach's role was to not find work for him, review his resume, or teach him how to network more effectively, but rather she seemed to provide him with a different framework for how to live his life. A more positive one.
Bill's coach had him participate in an exercise that I thought I would share since it is one I often pass along to clients and friends and have used myself:
- Write down three things each day that went well, and list the reasons why they went well. You can also think of this as a gratitude list: jotting down three reasons each day why you are grateful. I suggest reviewing the things that went well at the end of every day as well as the beginning of each day, especially as they accumulate. And watch what happens.
Want to skip the waiting part? Here is an example from my past: I have participated in this exercise during both a career transition that took me several years to figure out, and during a very frustrating job search. It seemed each day was filled with uncertainty about where I would end up, from waiting by the phone for a recruiter to call me back to not knowing how in the world to get out of a career I did not find fulfilling. Throughout these two life experiences I learned to focus on the daily things that went WELL, since things like waiting and wanting someone to call me back were out of my control.
Bottom line: once I started to concentrate and reflect on the good things that happened during my day, I slowly noticed a shift in what I focused on and my days and my life - my livelihood even- became less overwhelming and the unknown became less anxiety-provoking, and a little more comfortable.
So go ahead- decide to be positive. I promise it will change how you think! Want more information on your personal strengths and happiness levels? Go to http://www.authentichappiness.sas.upenn.edu/questionnaires.aspx and get interesting and FREE information about YOU!
